When are you due?

I never thought a trip to JoAnn's would turn out to be such an adventure. To back up a bit, Dan had decided he wanted to be Max from "Where the Wild Things Are" for his Halloween party at work. For those who know me, I like to pretend to be somewhat of a Martha Stewart in the kitchen. I enjoy baking, cooking and hostessing. But, step me out of the world of homemade goodies and tasty treats and into the realm of sewing and fabric and I morph into a clueless man. I'd love to be crafty and creative. I'd love to be one of those women that can just whip up throw pillows or recreate some fabulous duvet I've eyed at Pottery Barn. And although I know my talents are limited, or perhaps non-existent, I'll do anything for my husband and try my hardest to never disappoint him. So, armed with a pattern I found online (which looked easy enough) Dan and I headed to JoAnn's to pick up the items we would need to make his costume.

It was Saturday, so the store was bustling with women on a mission. We quickly found the fabric we needed and I parked Dan to wait in line with the mass of crafty women while I went and gathered our other materials. When I returned 15 minutes later, I found Dan in the exact spot I had left him becoming increasingly agitated at the system. After 15 minutes of standing there, he had discovered they were going by numbers, of which Dan had not grabbed. He retrieved his number and I tried to calm him. It appeared our wait wouldn't be much longer. Our number was getting close and another woman was stepping up to help out. I took a sigh of relief. Then she opened her mouth. "1 cut! I can help those with 1 cut here!" Dan, of course, had 2 cuts.

I couldn't keep him quiet any longer. He proceeded to heckle the woman. He tried to get the "crafties" to join along with his plight against this unfair system of discrimination against people with more than 1 cut, but the women weren't budging. Clutching their bolts of fabric and spools of ribbon they knew better than to anger the Gods of JoAnn's. The 10 minutes of waiting for our number that followed were interminable.

When it was finally our turn, I pushed Dan aside and stepped up to the table, smiled sweetly and tried to warm up to the ... what do you call these people? a fabric cutter? a textile technician? well, whatever, forgive me for my fabric store ignorance, the woman who was helping us. She says to me.. "When are you due?" I reply, "excuse me?"

In my defense, I honestly thought she asked me, "what do you do?" To which I immediately took offense believing she had already pegged me as an uncreative attorney that didn't belong in JoAnn's and I could not believe the audacity in asking my occupation! The poor woman became flustered and stammered a bit, repeating, "I asked when your little one is due."

This marks the first time a stranger has asked about the baby and acknowledged I was pregnant. Dan and I were very cautious when we found out we were pregnant and tried to keep our secret as long as we could. We told immediate family early, but kept it from our friends and extended family until we were in the second trimester and more comfortable that everything was going well. Suddenly, our secret seems to be written on me and everyone knows. It's a small thing really, just a stranger asking when the baby is supposed to arrive, but in a strange way, it feels so much bigger than that. Day by day, reality is setting in and I'm feeling more and more like a new mom. It's truly amazing how this little guy is changing me. Although, I must admit, Dan and I agreed this could be a new fun game. The look on her face was pretty priceless!

Oh, and about that clever "easy enough" costume... let's just say I'm lucky that my fabulous Martha Stewart in every way sister-in-law lives just blocks away. Sorry Hudson, it is unlikely that there are any homemade Halloween costumes in your future!